Before I underwent TMS, I was struggling with emotional flashbacks to adverse childhood experiences as well as depression/anxiety. I would sporadically cry uncontrollably when dealing with an emotional flashback. The circumstances that would cause these were unpredictable as well. For example, once, I had a terrible flashback while watching a TV show and felt incredibly angry and sad for the rest of the day.
Since I completed my full course of TMS, my emotional flashbacks have completely gone away, and I have not struggled with depression or anxiety except for on a couple of brief occasions. I am able to sleep better and have developed strong friendships. I've felt myself taking more initiative to improve my mental state whenever I'm not doing so well. Family relationships have healed as well. I love myself more than I did a year ago and have found myself to be generally more forgiving. TMS was much more effective than SSRIs I had taken with no side effects. If it's financially viable, I would recommend this treatment to anyone else who feels that they're suffering psychologically. -- A.P.
Before Deep TMS, I experienced Seasonal Depression, Major Depression, lack of energy, and strong feelings of hopelessness. I had gone through and completed traditional methods of: 1 year+ of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), anti-depressants, the use of a Sun Lamp, and diet and exercise. These methods helped momentarily or for a block period of time, but they did not ever really give me full relief that my depression was fully gone. After Deep TMS, 36 sessions, my Seasonal Depression is gone, my Major Depression is gone, and I do not have feelings of hopelessness. No more sun lamp and no more anti-depressants.
Before Deep TMS, every day was a major struggle, and those days were made worse if there were work-related stress events or interpersonal-related stress events. Simple tasks like taking out the trash, making a To-Do List, Grocery Shopping, Laundry, calling back Friends / Family, meeting friends for lunch or dinner, setting up appointments for self-care, paying basic bills - all were really hard to complete. Also, if I had dealt with people who were mean or rude, it used to impact me pretty harshly - as in, my resilience was low due to my depression.
Now, after completing Deep TMS, I feel back to my old self, where I can make travel plans, perform better at work, crack jokes on conference calls, follow up with friends, make to-do lists, travel on vacation, and go to the gym. If I encounter people who are rude or mean to me, it was kind of an astonishing moment where it did not impact me at all - like no reaction - not even the slightest. It just rolled off as if nothing had just happened.
RE: Eating habits, I feel that my eating has stabilized somewhat. I feel like I used to do a lot of stress eating, and after Deep TMS, I have observed that I eat more with intention.
Almost immediately after completing Deep TMS, I was able to finally take a Certification Exam for work, and passed the exam - something I had put off for over a year, since I did not have full motivation or energy to complete it. -- V.P.
Before TMS I wasn’t sure I would be able to continue with my life. I was trapped in a vicious cycle of anxiety and depression due to what I would later find is C-PTSD and Autism Spectrum Disorder. Medications and therapy offered diminishing returns and I felt I was coming to the end of my options. In a fortunate turn of events, my insurance changed to a plan that covered TMS and suddenly I had access to another option.
I remember the first time I felt the weight I had learned to live with “lift” off of me. It was like I was looking through a cloudy window for my whole life and someone just pulled out the Windex. After my first round of TMS I went from a PHQ-9 score in the mid-20 to 4. On paper, I had been cured. I felt a clear separation from my traumatized self and the person I was without trauma affecting every moment of my life. I described it to others as “seeing the matrix of emotions,” I could suddenly see myself with some level of objectivity.
The most meaningful change was the clarity of not taking every emotion so seriously that it became debilitating. I could finally take the therapy I already had access to and use it as a tool to fix the things I wanted to change about myself. TMS enabled me to participate effectively in my treatment and trust myself to take control.
I would not recommend this treatment to people who have other mental health options, like Dialectical Behavioral Therapy or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and medications. TMS alone is not going to fix you. You will wake up some days feeling elated and some days will feel as hard as day one. TMS lifts the burden of fighting off negative feelings long enough for you to utilize your mental health tools effectively. TMS requires dedication and patience. I did 3 rounds over 3 years due to traumatic events in my life like the pandemic, but the third time was the charm.
I can say now that I am on the other side of my TMS journey and I am exponentially better than I was on Day 1. Everyone around me has noticed the change in my mood and clarity. I have taken on challenges in my life that I never thought possible, like going to grad school and getting a promotion at work. It has given me the clarity to want better for myself in relationships. It helped me survive and thrive during the pandemic. It has truly changed my life for the better and I recommend it to anyone who has reached the end of their rope and would do anything to get better. Anyone fighting for a life they want but are not sure if they deserve. You deserve to be happy. TMS can help. -- Z.J.
